Last week I went on a trip with my residents to the Houston Museum of Natural Science.  We visited the Cockrell Butterfly Center exhibit to be exact.  I really like the HMNS.  I've been there quite a few times to see various exhibits.  If you're in Houston-check out the museum and see what neat-o things they have going on.  www.hmns.org

The trip to the Butterfly Center was something that the residents (senior citizens) had requested.  And since I live to make their lives wonderful-I do what they tell me.  The Butterfly Center consists of a children's area with big plastic bugs and stuffed bugs and kiddy stuff, a more scientific exhibit with dead bugs.  Ya know the dead bugs on stick pins with fancy labels.  And then there's the actual indoor garden area with hundreds of butterflies flying around.  Fun stuff for any age.  I was able to capture some pics of the butterflies.  Wanna see?  No-my blog post is too boring for you?  Oh, ok.  Well, I'll post them anyway.  So there!

His name is Jim.  He enjoys tracking the stock market and is thinking about flipping houses to make some extra money.

Mik likes to exercise.  He is constantly trying to out do the guy on the treadmill next to him.  As you can see he recently over did it at the gym and lost a chunk of his right wing. 

Bruce is the strong, silent type.  The ladies love his ability to express himself without seeming too feminine.  Needless to say he likes to play the field.  Don't worry Bruce you'll find the girl of your dreams one of these days.  Hopefully soon though as your lifespan is a mere week.  Oh-you didn't know that.  Sorry.

Kirk is a 'metro sexual.'  He is constantly checking his wings in the mirror and freaks out when one of his antennas gets wrinkled.  As well as being overly concerned with his looks he also enjoys photography.  His favorite subject-himself, of course. 

Look familiar?  Pierre is the distant cousin of Mik.  And I do mean distant.  While Mik is more of a mans man, Pierre tends to be very retrospective about his life.  He knows it will be short and wants to spend his time adding to the world in a positive light. 

Sup Bryan?  His close friends call him Buzz.  Bryan is a sports freak.  And if he's not at home watching the game he's probably at the local bar...watching the game.  He thinks about sports 24/7.  His friends would get him some professional help if it weren't for the fact that he was going to die in 27 hours.  Sorry Bryan.

This is Dave.  Dave wouldn't tell me anything about himself.  He said that blogs are a waste of time and that I need to get a life.  He was a total grouch and wanted nothing to do with anyone.  Whatever Dave.  Did your Mother tell you that you're going to die in two days?  Oh no?  Sorry Dave.

What a sweetheart this guy is.  Liam was excited to hear about my blog and even more excited to hear that I'd be bloggin about him!  He's not into himself, but wanted me to be able to get a good representation of his species.  What a guy!  Liam is also chair of the book club.  His all-time favorite book is, In the Time of the Butterflies, by Julia Alvarez. 

Wayne holds the musical talent of the group.  He enjoys playing both the piano and the trumpet.  He has also composed music that was selected for a photo journalistic documentary about what else...butterflies.  He's also been know to bust out a few ghetto raps once in a while after a few beers. 

Like his intricate wing pattern, Gary has a complicated life.  He is trying to get custody of his 821 children from his crazy ex-wife, Jessica.  She cheated on him with his friend Bruce.  Yes, the same Gary that likes to smooth talk ladies.  Bruce is also trying to advance his career as a graphic designer and lower his cholesterol.

Xander is so good with words.  He is a published poet and is also collaborating with Vince Gill on a few country songs that you might hear in his upcoming album.  Xander is also a strong believer in astrology.  Xander is a Scorpio and lives up to his sign by being a loyal-compassionate butterfly. 

Issac is what I refer to as a punk.  Don't let his graceful exterior fool you.  Issac is one of the teenagers of the bunch.  And we all know what that means.  Rolling eyes, tattoos, sexual experimentation, and loud music.  This is a rare shot of him without his ear buds in.  His favorite band is Violent Femmes. 

Benjamin is the last butterfly that I spoke with on the day of my visit.  He had been trying to avoid my camera all day.  He's a humble butterfly who doesn't want to talk about himself.  He did tell me a bit about his family and historical home that they are remodeling.  He's trying to improve a neighborhood that's been overlooked for years.  As well as home remodeling he loves to volunteer at the local animal shelter.  He's a very philanthropic individual. 

All in all. I had a nice time visiting with the butterflies at the Cockrell Butterfly Center.  Some were more willing to chat than others...  And for some reason they were all males.  I assume that the women of the center were busy birthing babies, cleaning up around the house,  cooking brownies, and whatever else it is that the perfect house wife does.  Believe it or not-butterflies lead a rather 1950's lifestyle.  

J

My tummy is stuffed full and I know now that I will need to some extra sessions at the gym to work off the bbq hamburgers, potato salad, macaroni salad and the chocolate cake we had for desert.  To my credit, or maybe not to my credit (I'll let the readers be the judge,) I was too full by the time I hit cake to eat a second slice.  My older brother didn't mind this so much as it meant extra cake leftover for him later on.  Can't say I blame him though - the boiled icing my mother makes... yum!

In between the main course and dessert, we were treated with a round of singing & guitar playing - the best kind too - the songs my father had written when we were kids, the staples of the family get-together, the songs all us kids could sing, and the ones that we (those of us who play guitar) have been taking pains to learn to play.  There's the song about the loud mouthed frog, and then the one about a father's wish for his son to have a place to fish when the son gets older.  Ohhh and I almost forgot the standby - "There's a flea on the hair on the fly on the wart on the frog on the bump on the log in the hole in the bottom of the sea..." (Apologies but there seem to be a few sound glitches in the youtube video for this song, but it is the closest rendition to the song I learned as a child.)  My husband, unfamiliar with the songs of my youth, did the honors and videoed much of the session.  It was a real delight to be able to share these songs with the little ones.. passing on family heritage.  On the way home I remarked to my husband that I miss these types of gatherings.  I must resolve to do more of them.

We swapped family stories, retold many old ones - the ones worthy of being retold or were just being relived because that is the family tradition.  We talked about my fear of leeches.  Heck, turns out most everybody in the family hates them, just that I was the one with the loudest scream if I became host to one.  My oldest brother recounted his truck driving stories, regaling us with tales of him intimidating people who somehow saw fit to harass him over the radio, only to reconsider their ways once he untangled his 6'4", 300 plus pound body out of the cab of his truck.  Yes, a good time all around.

Sadly, my one brother decided not to come to the party.  A last minute cancellation as he opted for going camping with his family.  His absence at the party meant there were only 12 of us instead of the expected 17.  I missed having him there, but gave him a call tonight on his cell phone to wish him a happy birthday.  Appears he is only about 30 miles out of town, so tomorrow after the Farmer's Market, I may point the car in a southerly direction and pop down to visit him, his wife and the kids.   I'm going to make sure I leave the guitar in the car - be nice to go and share some music time with them all.

Well, that's it.  A simple recap of the night.  I'm glad I went.  Someday I will learn not to get myself all worked up before I go out to family gatherings.  I know that in the end, I completely enjoy myself.

Bye for now.

I stopped reading for pleasure when I was in medical school. It was four long years of academic text only. I didn't have the time or energy to keep up with my passion. I had to focus on taking tests every week and studying for multiple classes at the same time. I didn't even realize the transition. It just happened. I guess I was just too absorbed trying to survive being a medical student.

When I finally finished residency and became an attending physician, I was able to get back to reading for fun. I've never been able to read at home, for one reason or another. So I now read on the train. Two or three years ago, my commmute was about  1 1/2 hours which gave me plenty of time to read. That's three hours of reading a day. I was usually able to get through a book in about three or four days. Now my commute is twenty minutes. I'm able to get through a book anywhere from one to two weeks. Besides vying for a space to hold on and doing a balancing act with my book, I get completely absorbed in reading. It evens makes my commute seem to go faster.

My father has always commuted into the city. He never seems to get bothered by it. I think I take after him. I like the transition from going from home to work and vice versa. The commute is not only a transition ride, but it gives me time for myself that I'm not otherwise able to get. Even though I work in Manhattan, I made a conscious decision to live outside so that I can have a boundary between work and my personal life. I'm glad I'm able to use the train ride as a boundary as well as keeping up with my passion for reading.

After the last few days of retail turmoil, it was a pleasant change of pace to have a leisurely day planned; breakfast out at our fav pancake house/diner, a relaxing read and a cuppa java at Barnes & Noble, a lunch with peanut butter and Nutella spread involved, a quick nap, and then meet up with Teri Ann for several hours standing in a field under blazing sun (okay it wasn't quite blazing but it was hotter than the hubs of hell) while target shooting.  It doesn't get any better than that.  Now that's what I call retirement.

Here's what I was shooting with; a Bersa thunder .380 semi-automatic.  It's sweet.

Teri Ann practiced hitting those bullseyes on a Colt .38 Detective special revolver, a nifty little 6-shooter that's she had for about 20 years. 

Devoted Spouse had more pistols and revolvers than I have pictures.. a Kimber .45 pro-carry semi-automatic, a Glock .40 Model 23, semi-automatic and a Smith & Wesson .38 Model 642 revolver. 

So now I can say I'm not only an NRA member, I can shoot, too.  Oh yeah, and just in case you think this is all fun and guns, I mean games, here are the Basic Rules of Safe Gun Handling:

1.  All guns are always loaded.
2. Never point a gun at anything you are unwilling to destroy.
3. Keep your finger off the trigger until you are ready to fire.
4. Know your target.
5. Keep your gun at the minimum level of readiness.
These rules are valid whether you are hunting game, practicing target shooting, or confronting an intruder.

So, now I'm off to load a couple of ziploc baggies with ice cubes to help my poor, swollen hands, and I think I'll grab a few Aleve to help my aching back.  I'm a little out of shape for shooting, but I'm sure I'll get better with practice.

While on our Camp last week, we tried something that we haven't ever had. We haven't even had this done in a modern oven. But they sounded good.

Before I share the recipe, I should let you know that we got the recipe from Rhodes Bake-N-Serv. They offer great recipes for those who buy their product. But my wife and I are too cheap to pay their price, so we just use her Fridge Dough recipe that I shared with you earlier.

Then we followed the recipe modified for the dutch oven:

12 Dinner Rolls, thawed by still cold (we divided 1 loaf worth of fridge dough)
1 Orange rind, grated
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 cup butter, melted

Citrus glaze:
1 cup powdered sugar
1 tablespoon butter, melted
3 tablespoons orange juice (we just used the juice from the orange that we rinded).
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Mix grated orange rind with sugar. Roll each roll into a 9-inch rope. Tie in a loose knot. Roll each knot in melted butter (was melted in the dutch oven) and then in rind/sugar mixture. Place in dutch oven with remaining melted butter. Cover and let rise until double in size. Bake at 350F for 20-25 minutes. Poor citrus glaze on rolls before serving.

They were good. The only reason we had any left over was because I was full already, and I could imagine stuffing myself any more. But there were gone early the next day.

I am still trying to figure out how to keep breads from getting over done on the bottom, and how to brown the tops. This time we tried flipping th rolls. This worked, but it was difficult and messy. I think that I am going to try putting more coals on top, and less on the bottom next time.

1) The brown and pink polka dot dress for yours truly.  I cut out the pattern pieces roughly, so I just need to cut closer to the lines in order to get started cutting the fabric.  I bought the zipper I needed for the dress too.  I hope I got the right length.  I didn't have my notes with me.  Either way it should work out fine.  I can always exchange it.  Now I have no other excuses, but to get to work!

2) Crochet this shrug: Shrug Springs Eternal in black with a purple ribbon for the closure.  I bought this lovely extra fine yarn at Pacific Fabrics yesterday.  I hope it's enough, I only bought one skien.  I will be posting pictures here as soon as I get started.

My current projects on the needles are a lace square that I am trying to complete so that I can block it and figure out how many it will take to make a coverlet for our bed.  I am also crocheting a bath mat for our bathroom.  The pattern can be found in "One Skein" by Leigh Radford.  I also got some cross-stitch books from the library the other day and am working on reviving my love of that craft.

I am looking forward to sharing my life and my love of crafts.  I hope you enjoy this blog as much as I hope I will enjoy writing it.

Technology has changed so much of the way we live. Computers and the internet have especially produced very significant impacts on the way we do different stuff. It made us change the way we do business. The internet revolutionized the way we study. These technologies definitely revolutionized the way we access information. The internet changed the way we build social circles. Last, but definitely not the least, the internet changed the way we look at entertainment.

Some people may disagree, but the internet is definitely the best idea since sliced bread. The internet makes humanity capable of so many things that today, imagination is the only limit. Just think of how come we have far in so few years. A decade ago, the cellular phone was a pathetically large device, which allowed you to call other people, and could not do much else. Now, we have cellular phones that allow you to check your mail, shop, take and share videos and photographs, and virtually any other activity imaginable. Surely, this is a great evidence of the accelerating technological evolution.

There was a time when what you needed to create a scrapbook were paper, scissors, memorabilia, pictures, pens, coloring material and lots of glue. A good idea, of course, was essential to making a good scrapbook. You needed to take time to form a scrapbook out of the little bits and pieces you had. Creativity was a must in order to create the perfect scrapbook.

The advent of the internet also changed that. Today, there are downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking in the internet. This new technology has a few advantages and disadvantages. Let's take a look at them, shall we?

Advantages:

1) It saves time and effort - Downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking save time. This is because with downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking, you do not need to take a long time to think up ideas or a general theme for your scrapbook.

There is also the issue of effort. Making a scrapbook from scratch often needs dedication. You need to put in the effort to create a thing of beauty. However, most people today do not have the energy to expend on scrapbooking.

With downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking, you only need to choose which style you want and voila! You have a scrapbook. Many people choose this because of the fact that the world we live in today doesn't really allow us to have much free time. We need to put in the hours to earn money and survive.

2) Easy to share - most downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking in the internet today allow you to share the scrapbook you made to the whole world. You see, most downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking actually need you to upload the images and photos in the internet and there create a virtual scrapbook.

Of course this can't really compare to holding a scrapbook you made with your own hands. However, for those who want instant connectivity, then downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking are perfect for you.

Disadvantages:

1) Uniformity - with downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking, you get to choose from a lot of designs. Because of this feature, however, your scrapbook will lack the individuality that truly makes scrapbooks beautiful. You see, a scrapbook has to reflect your personality. The fact that you make scrapbooks from scratch guarantees that your scrapbook will be unique in the world.

2) Limited to photos - you see, you cannot really upload pieces of memorabilia in order to put into an online scrapbook. We all know that the best scrapbooks use a mixture of pictures and memorabilia in order to truly capture a special event in our lives. We don't really carry a camera around all the time (but nowadays, because of cell phone cameras, some of us do). There are just some experiences, which cannot be fully expressed by a photograph.

There you go: those are some pros and cons of using downloadable albums for free photo scrapbooking. You need to realize that whatever other people tell you about how a scrapbook should look like and how you should create one, the final look of the scrapbook should always reflect your personality. A scrapbook talks about your life, thus, no one can really judge what it should look like, except you.

You can now make a fashion statement with your crocheted project. Crochet ponchos are getting more popular nowadays even with celebrities. Its soft texture and stylish design makes it a must to include in your wardrobe.

If you are into crocheting, you can make your own poncho that will fit you perfectly and suit your taste. There are several designs and patterns available in the World Wide Web that you can access and follow for your personal use. Here are some examples of the different crochet poncho designs that you can choose:

- Adult Poncho Sweater. This poncho pattern from Emerald Moon Creations is a sexy kind of poncho sweater as it has the curve in the right place. It has a wide neckline with sleeves falling just above the elbow and a v-shaped, wavy bottom edges.

- Arizona Poncho. This wide poncho from Brons Fiber Stuff is more like a rectangular poncho. When laid flat, it looks like a huge piece of crocheted square pattern with a hole in the middle. This one is simple and easy to make.

- Asymmetrical Cross-Stitch Poncho. From Craftown, and contributed by a certain designer named Cristina Heredia, this asymmetrical poncho is striking because of the color used. It uses the cross stitch pattern and can easily be followed even by beginners. This crochet poncho is like a simple rectangular one but with one side pointed or longr than the other.

- Bead-trimmed Crochet Poncho. Here is a different variation of the usual poncho. It looks light and very comfortable to wear. What makes it different are the bead trimmings on the bottom edges of the poncho. It is easy to do yet the output is elegant-looking.

- Beauty in Bloom Poncho. This light blue, wide-necked ponchette is very lady like. Its length just reaches slightly above the waistline. It also has dark blue flower patterns just below the neckline. A free pattern for this crochet poncho can be found in Crochet Pattern Central.

- Gentle Ripples Poncho. A crochet poncho good for plus-sized women, this one has a simple A-type cut that falls up to the thighs. The ripple pattern used is easy to follow, even a beginner can do. This one is designed by the Crochet bythehook site owner named Dot.

- Black and White Poncho. This all v-shaped black and white crochet poncho is ideal during the colder months. Its stitches are close together that will surely give you the softness and warmth you need during winter. The pattern for this crochet poncho is found at Crochetlady’s page in Angel Fire.

- Springtime Poncho. Designed by Marie of Crochet Me, this spring-inspired poncho is ideal for bigger women. It has a low neckline that falls like the shape of a bell. This one is ideal to wear during the warmer months as it has wide-spaced stitches. Those who want a much smaller size for this design just need to use a smaller hook.

- Petite Poncho. This petite crochet poncho is for your little ones. It has an almost-off-shoulder neckline with stitches that ends up to the midrib, then tied to form groups of strands to form the bottom design. It is definitely easy to follow and makes your little girls prettier than ever.

- Town and Country Poncho. A plain white crochet poncho, this one looks best over a slim black dress. It looks simple yet very fashionable. It also provides a fresh look to the person wearing it. This pattern was classified as easy, so even beginners can do this. The pattern is found in the Lion Brand collection of patterns.

- Monster-In-Law Poncho. Yet another asymmetrical crochet poncho, this pattern has different pastel colors which makes it look fresh in the eyes. Its bottom are formed by groups of strands tied on the bottom edge of the stitches. This pattern can be printed out from the Lion Brand web site.

These are just a few examples of the different crochet poncho patterns you can find in the internet. There are much more in books and magazines in your local book shop. So whether you are just a first timer in this cool hobby or an advanced needle worker, there is a pattern available for you. Even the most stylish and fashionable poncho can be done by just a beginner. So what are you waiting for? Start hunting now for that unique pattern and begin crocheting! Have fun!

Source: Downloaded from http://images.google.com/images?hl=zh-TW&q=the+dark+knight

Haha the only person I liked in this two and a half hours movie was the Jocker. I think he is a great actor and it was so funny when he was dressed like a nurse XD!!! Heath Ledger-too bad he died at the beginning of this year.

The only thing I don't understand is why he always said that he never had plans? If he didn't he wouldn't have done anything he did. Everything was planned perfectly. =S Anyways, a movie is a movie >.<''

The increasing popularity in Bowman Chrome products has created a stir among some collectors who are now not only looking for a player's rookie card, but also their first Bowman Chrome card. It's really an interesting phenomenon. The emphasis in recent years has been greatly on rookie cards, but as is the case with some budding stars, their first Bowman Chrome card -- even if it was released a year later -- has caught fire, the most recent example being Chase Utley. His 2002 Bowman Chrome card has hit double digits, and in some cases has surpassed or matched the going rate of his actual rookie cards that were produced a full year earlier. But while this trend has become even more popular with chrome cards produced in recent years, there is one first Bowman Chrome card that likely will not ride this wave: 2001 Bowman Chrome Miguel Cabrera.

There are two factors that play into this. First off, Cabrera has a Topps Traded Chrome rookie card, so that sooths the chrome itch for collectors. But secondly, Cabrera's first Bowman Chrome card is an error, he is not even pictured on the card. Take a look at the card above, do you know who that is? I'm almost certain that is Miguel Batista. (edit: I've been informed that it could be Denny Bautista, who actually played for the Marlins in 2001.)

It's a shame that Topps -- the maker of Bowman products -- did not catch this error. (Note: This has happened a few times -- see 1995 Topps Traded Carlos Beltran RC error, and 2000 Bowman Eric Byrnes error) This card would have been interesting to watch if conditions were right because the 2001 Bowman Chrome set has become one of the most important issues created over the last decade. The Albert Pujols autographed rookie is perhaps the most sought-after card this side of Y2K, and other cards in the set have also caught fire, namely rookies of Jose Reyes, Jake Peavy, and Justin Morneau. But for now, and probably forever, we're looking at another ho-hum second-year issue of Cabrera that does not actually picture Cabrera.

She wasn't even singing, she was just pushing out sounds, not even enunciating and the crowd cheered every time it sounded like something they'd heard on the radio. Is this really to be encouraged? This cocaine-karaoke? I'd never felt more disgusted. Get help.

Though, on the plus side, it was followed by an incredibly tight and powerful performance by R.E.M who played as if it was still 1995.

What else... U2: friend or foe? It's easy to hate them thanks to Bono and the stadium bozos they've become but they used to make some great tunes. Running To Stand Still? Brilliant. I've just done the lone U2 entry on my Essential Albums blog and no, it's not Joshua Tree.

Let's see... more fun at work. A week that's seen our team win the rounders tournament and me bag a 2nd place trophy after a day out that included a morning's Go Karting.

See:

That's me in there. Though after hitting the wall of tyres not winning this:

Still, as the man says, I'd rather have more money in the bank than fun at work.

There's finally a practice session on the near horizon for BrokenOrchestra too. Just in time as I'm not far off leaving for my holiday and I have a good mind not to come back. I'm itching to record the tracks I've written so I can build the other layers on them I hear in my head. After the claustrophobic sound of the last album I'm trying to create a more open, lighter sound but one built on melody not just noise. So we shall see.

My mother seems to hold the belief that constant online challenges at WordTwist, Scramble and Srabble equate to communication.

A little while ago I came upon an idea that I then voiced to Linda at my sister's wedding: Hate Hearts. You know those little hearts that say things like "Wuv U" and other sick-bucket fillers? Well I thought there'd be a market - a novelty one, mind - for a more cynical candy. "Get Fucked," "Screw Off" and "Choke On This" being my original conceptions. Well, in an unrelated browse of the Google images section I seem to have, once again, been beaten to the punch:

Perhaps, then a line of "Chav Hearts" with "innit" "yeah boi" and "SAFE" inscribed upon them? C'mon sweet manufacturers, buy my idea, I'm cheap!

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From How to Do Things.com

Rnd 1: Ch 4, join w sl st in 1st ch to form ring, ch 3, 11 dc in ring, join w sl st in top of ch 3 (12 dc). Rnd 2: Ch 3, dc in next dc, 2 dc in next dc, * dc in next 2 dc, 2 dc in next dc, rep from * around, join as before (16 dc). Rnds 3-4: Ch 3, dc in each dc around, join as before (16 dc). Rnd 5: Ch 3, dc in next dc, dc dec over next 2 dc, * dc in next 2 dc, dc dec over next 2 dc, rep from * around, join as before, fasten off, leaving a 12" length of yarn for sewing (12 dc).

Finishing:Stuff rock lightly with fiberfill. Weave 12" length of yarn through tops of Rnd 5 dcs, pull to close hole, secure with a few sts. Glue on wiggle eyes. Let dry. Enjoy!

For children 3 and under, eliminate the wiggle eyes and embroider 2 French knots for eyes.

*Amateur Hour, a showcase at Self Interest and Sympathy for new learning, knowledge, skill or entertainment* Submissions welcome to selfinterestandsympathy [at] gmail.com

But now, I'll have to put those habits aside. There are tasks that need to be done and my laundry has been waiting several weeks and many hours.

I have tried to get this farm going for the longest time. Every time I think I'm there, it comes crashing down around me again. People are always telling me I need to move on and "get a real job", a "real career", go back to school and "be realistic" about what I am going to do, and (my favorite) "stop dreaming".

Until recently, I did fairly well at ignoring everyone who told me all of those things. Granted, there were times I almost gave in, but I never did. I held onto the fragments of my shattered dream with all of the stubborn strength I have in me. Then the divorce came. It left me devastated, feeling unloved, unworthy, unable to accomplish anything. Basically it left me feeling like a failure, and like someone who would never reach any dream. People in my life saw (most likely subconsciously) that I was weak in my resolve and easily persuaded, and they pounced. They convinced me that I would never succeed in achieving a self-sustaining farm. They slowly pried my fingers away from their death-grip on my shattered dream and tossed it in the dumpster like a parent does with a child's favorite toy that has been broken.

I felt broken and lost, without a purpose. Initially I blamed it on the divorce, and grieving over the loss of my marriage. Farm supply catalogs would come in the mail and instead of losing myself in them for hours, dreaming of the day I could justify buying the ivermectin in bulk, or dropping several bills on a stable blanket with my farm's monogrammed logo, I would just toss them in the trash without so much as opening them. Two or three weeks ago my Quarter Horse Journal came in the mail, and as I was in a hurry, I just tossed it in the back seat of my car to throw away later. I had completely forgotten about it until today as I was grabbing my journal out of the car, I managed to get the QHJ wedged between the pages. I didn't notice I had done that until I was inside Caribou. It shocked me when I saw it because I realized I hadn't even looked at the cover photo in that entire three weeks. Noticing a teaser on the front about a writeup concerning one of my horse's grandsires, I flipped it open. The flame I thought I had snuffed out grew steadily as I read, and I realized that I had that peaceful feeling I had been missing for these past months- that kind of inner warmth that just let's you know where you are or what you're doing is exactly where you should be.

I continued reading, and as I skimmed the training section, I noticed myself making mental notes about possible approaches to an issue I was having troubles with my mare. After I had read the magazine from cover to cover, I closed it, shut my eyes, and sat in silence for several minutes. I wrestled with a lot of stuff as questions and various problems arose in my mind. For the first time ever, I thought about what I wanted and where I wanted to be and actually listened to the concerns people have shared with me over my chosen profession. In the end it all came down to the following:

#1- Horses make me happy. More than just "yay- isn't that fun?" happy, no they bring a peace to my life. It's almost like when I'm working with horses, I feel closer to God.

#2- If I don't have dreams, I don't have a reason to get up in the morning.

#3- I can't do this alone. What I've really been missing all of this time, the final piece of the puzzle that I need to actually succeed is support. I need a partner. I need someone to do it with me.

#4- What I need to do right now is focus on getting a "real" job (one that has a regular paycheck) for now. I need to keep my one horse so I don't lose faith.

#5- I need to back-off on trying to get the whole farm-thing going for a while. I need to also realize that I may never find someone to do it with. In which case, I need to be content with horses as a small time hobby. Which is OK. I never gave myself that option before. Small time hobby is OK.

This is going to take a lot of patience on both mine and God's part. I've just gotta have faith!

Enjoy!  Mmmmm.  Del.icio.us!

1. CRUST: In a medium bowl, mix cookie crumbs and butter. Press into bottom of cheesecake pan and freeze.
2. FILLING: In large mixer bowl, beat cream cheese and sour cream on medium-high speed for 3 minutes. Mix in flour, brown sugar, and honey until well-blended, about 2 minutes. Add eggs, one at a time, beating after each addition. Add candied ginger, ground ginger and cinnamon. Pour batter over crust. Bake in preheated over for 55 to 65 minutes or until the top is light brown and the center has a slight jiggle to it. Cool on a rack for 2 hours. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 6 hours before decorating or serving.
3. DECORATION: Ice to of cake with whipped cream topping (or pipe a ribbon around the border, if desired). Sprinkle with ground ginger and cinnamon.

Well, amen to that.  Bruce, were these yours? 

As I wrote before, I am extremely sad I didn't get a video of Bruce singing while we waited for our subs to be ready.  He was not exactly how I pictured him while reading his blog; I thought he'd be older and more dryly cynical.  I would not have guessed that he'd stand around singing songs about potatoes in a perfect Maine accent.  Bruce, perhaps if you posted a picture of yourself in a kilt for your "About" page, we could avoid these misconceptions in the future?  Although, really, this shot would probably have the same effect:

Which we do we like better, boys 'n' girls?  The TeleTubbie with its insides on the outside, or the lil' Shrek dolls waiting to be murdered?

Bruce and Jay were the only folks I actually "knew" (on an Internet basis) before I headed up to the Meet.  Unlike Bruce, Jay was pretty much what I expected, looks and temperament wise.  I think this picwas all that was needed to get an accurate feel for Jay.  (By the way, I'd change it to "If you make her cry, I will make you bleed."  Just sayin'.)  He ran around all day like an insane yet friendly hybrid of Dr. Evil and John Malkovich, garnished with a dash of the Monopoly guy.  And his bayonet charge was one of the funniest things I've seen in a loooooong time

I hadn't run across Ted before the meet, but if I had I'd be surprised at how young he was.  Ted, are you sure that picture is of you?  It doesn't look like you!!  Poor Ted sat next to me during lunch so he had to listen to me the whole time; sorry, mate.  As a silver lining, I amused myself by force-feeding him cookies :)

Here's my best shot of the range along its length; you can see poor Laa-Laa dangling, desperately trying to believe that one day -- ONE DAY -- this death-by-a-thousand-shots will come to a merciful end.  And perhaps some nice little girl will take her down, and bring her home, and patch her up, and she'll wake up as the Velveteen Rabbit.  Or maybe even Sleeping Beauty.  NOT LIKELY, YOU IRRITATING YELLOW SPAWN OF CHILD-SATAN.

Oh yeah, and you can see, from left to right, zeeke42, JD and TOTWTYTR.  Sorry guys, I got distracted by my gut-deep dislike of moronic singing pieces of [bleep].

I just thought this looked cool:

As did these:

A few more odds and ends tomorrow, but I suppose we have to end the post with this:

I hope Justice Stevens has nightmares about this.  And incontinence.

I didn't mean that.

Or maybe I did.

• AMD Athlon 4600+ (2.4Ghz)
• ECS Motherboard
• 2GB Kingston Memory
• ATI Radeon 1650 (512 MB)
• 160 GB Seagate Barracuda
• LG 16X 8X 52X DVD - Writer
• Running on Windows XP SP3

]]> http://erichasissues.wordpress.com/?p=682 Thu, 24 Jul 2008 20:59:56 +0000 eric http://erichasissues.wordpress.com/?p=682 When you're lost, you go back to the beginning. For the last few months I've been in a sort of lost state. I've got a lot going on, but nothing of substance. The fact is that I have been neglecting my own needs for the sake of others around me. I've let the little things go by the wayside believing that they will never come to fruition. How pathetic is that?

I could take the easy way out and blame others, but that wouldn't be true or effective. My situation is brought on by myself only!

I started this blog as a way to get things off my chest. At times I've been pretty open other times I've composed a piece and deleted it. Rather than wallow in the past, it's time to do a 180 and look ahead.

But first one last look back

This week I came across a blog called amtrekker.com. This guy is a vagabond who is traveling around the country checking off a list of 50 things from telling Donald Trump "You're Fired!" to going down in a coal mine. Back in April 2006 I made such a list of 50 things I wanted to do in 500 days. As corny as it may seem I've actually done a fair amount of them, but I haven't updated in a while.
Start Date: May 1, 2006
Finish Date: September 12, 2007

I figure that I'm draging them out a few more months maybe even years.

Vacation in Hawaii-(completed 11-1-06) we had a great trip for our 15th anniversary. I'm currently making plans for our 20th
Learn to play the harp-(ongoing) I've been sitting down with the harp once or twice a week now for a few months, mostly finger skills and exercises. I'm not quite ready for a recital.
Drink more water-(ongoing) I've actually got a 2 gallon jug that I fill daily...well not daily, but I have been drinking more. I still drink a lot of soda. There is room to cut back there.
Loose 10 pounds - yeah right!
Loose 10 more pounds - See above
Hike to the top of Cowles Mountain (completed 5-27-06) been there three times all together. It's a great hike and on a clear day can see for 80 miles to the north
Ride my bike more - (I donated my bike earlier this year) needless to say, I haven't been riding much.
Get an iPod-my wife did get me a Sansa Clip 2 gig this year for my birthday. It's easy enough to use and syncs with Windows Media Player
Do more woodworking-I have been hitting this one pretty hard. A few jewelry boxes and a wind driven harp in the works currently
Be more assertive-I actually did this in a discussion I had with my wife last night...It felt kinda good
Forget my shortfalls-In progress. I'm not sure If I can come to grips with this aspect of my life
Practice my guitar more-yep. If I had a way to record, I've actually got some ditties that are kinda nice
Do a Messier Marathon-this is an all night event that comes around every march. For 5 or 6 days you can spot all 110 objects through a telescope. The only problem is that you need to stay up nearly all night.
Read my Bible daily (completed 6-15-06) - Sure I read it every day for a few weeks. I need to get back into this habit.
Visit my brother in Colorado-my niece is getting married next year. By hook or by crook we will be heading to Littleton.
Speak my mind-see be more assertive
Speak the truth-No comment right now.
Go 4 days without spending any money-I don't think this is possible. I've gone 2, then had to fill up the tank or we needed fruit.
Potty train my son-DONE!!! Hallelujah! This kid was tough
Read a Shakespeare play (completed 4-29-06) I still reference old Billy for words of wit and wisdom
Go camping (completed 7-31-06) we have tent camped every summer for the last 2 years, and we are heading out next week for a trip to Arrowhead.
Go fishing-we may actually fish this year
Go for a Hike (completed 9-1-06) we have been out a few times in the last few years. Stonewall, Cowls, and on the camping trips. We were planning a trip to hike St Helens, but plane fair may put the stops on that.
Repel down a cliff-I haven't done this one, but I may sub it out for river rafting
Clean my garage and keep in clean (completed 5-01-06) - Cleaned and re-cleaned. It never ends
Be less critical of others-this it tough. I can see the best in kids, but look for the worst in adult and especially myself.
Give my kids a break-I have gotten better at this. Sometimes I come down on them harder than I should, but for the most part, I've mellowed out.
Play frogs with my son...I'll be the red one (completed 5-8-06) - We don't play this game any more. Now he wants to wrestle
See a Padre game at Petco Park (completed 6-23-06) - seen a handful of games over the last few years. The next step would be getting really good seats...like right on the3rd base line.
Go to a rock concert-just missed Journey, Heart, and Cheap Trick
Write a short story-this blog has been somewhat of a medium story, does it count?
Volunteer at a soup kitchen-I haven't volunteered at a soup kitchen, but I have put in a ton of time at the school.
Be more Flexible-
Be on TV-Not yet
Do a 5k run/walk-tons of opportunities, no initiative
Do paintball-I don't want to get shot, however our church has paintball on Wednesdays
Go skiing-we haven't gone skiing since the kids were born, but last year in Yosemite, the girls thought that snowboarding could be fun.
Go for Sushi-Need to do...with, but probably without my wife.

Exercise some self control (completed 5-16-06) I have compulsive and addictive behaviors.

Cut back on sugar - see above
Learn origami- I learned how to make a rabbit, and taught the kids in my girls classes how for Easter last year.
Drive a Zamboni-I had a friend that worked for the San Diego Gulls a few years ago, since that team went toes up, that dream my be lost forever
Grow a 15' tall sunflower-12' was my last years best, this years crop was taken out by vandals.
Go Bowling-we went bowling last January when we were in Bass Lake. I rolled a 93...I came in 2nd to an 8 year old who bowled a 98
Have a rip roaring 40th birthday party-my wife put together a surprise dinner for me with some friends. I wasn't rip roaring, but we had a nice evening out.
Support a worthy cause-financially or with my time, I found that volunteering can be pretty rewarding. Starting next month I'll be a coach for the local AYSO. Kids are always a worthy cause.
Learn to love life more-I really need to turn a corner. At one time I thought I was getting it together, but recently I've been having a tough time dealing.
Laugh with my wife-over the last few years we have laughed together tempered wit the occasional serious discussion. There may be hope for us after all.
Stop yelling-I have curbed it, but it's in my genes.
Start loving again--Myself, my wife and my kids that's the goal

With all of the living I do each day - the parenting, the working, the wife-ing - I don't have a whole lot of extra time. And, I haven't quite figured out how to work a system. Maybe that doesn't make sense if you don't scrapbook. But there's a lot of gear involved in turning out these pages. If you're not blessed enough to have a designated space to work, and I don't, it's time-consuming to pull it all out and get situated. I'm trying to figure out how to do this.

But I've got a new desire. There's always a first step, right? My mom got my sister and me a day of scrapbooking at Archiver's for our birthdays (we were born 2 weeks less than 2 years apart). Talk about a gift! It's like she gave me extra time to breathe. It's cathartic! I love just sitting there and appreciating my life. I think about all the good times. I'm not balancing activities or thinking about the budget or the schedule. I'm smiling and remembering and suddenly I'm breathing a little slower and I'm happier.

If a hobby can do all that, it's worth finding time to do it. I'm feeling pretty inspired to go pull out my stash and get to it.